For example, the writer offers a possible reason for why Bogard chose to open his argument with a personal anecdote, and is also able to describe the overall effect of that choice on his audience In telling this brief anecdote, Bogard challenges the audience to remember a time where they could fully amass themselves in natural darkness void of artificial light.
Writing—1: This response demonstrates little cohesion and inadequate skill in the use and control of language.
There is a consistent use of both precise word choice and well-chosen turns of phrase the natural magnificence of stars in a dark sky is definite, our world consumed by unnatural, vapid lighting, the affecting power of an untainted night sky.
Sentence structure is varied, and some precise phrasing is used to convey ideas robbed of the oppurtunity, their own personal health. The different features also help him in appealing to a broader audience.
This urges the readers to weigh the disadvantages of our world consumed by unnatural, vapid lighting.
Giving evidence of a historical artist Van Gogh adds a lot of emotion to this particular essay. It shows that even a city that is literally famous for being constantly lit can practically address light pollution in a manner that preserves the beauty of both the city itself and the universe as a whole.
He then goes on to state how Paris has taken steps to exercise more sustainable lighting practices. He notes that there are a variety of nocturnal and crepuscular species of birds, fish, mammals, insects, and reptiles worldwide.
The essay then follows a clear, if formulaic, format. He also claims light is messing with mother nature that animals need darkness to feed eat move around because there noctuaral creatures.
The response also lacks a recognizable introduction and conclusion, and sentences are strung together without a clear progression of ideas for much of the response, the writer merely lists claims Bogard makes.
With these features he can persuade the auidence because people dont know why darkness can be good for us.
This type of insightful analysis is evident throughout the response and indicates advanced analytical skill.